Spring has finally come. Snow melts away, revealing the grit and grime of months past. She can hear tires grinding against the pavement in the distance. Rapidly gaining speed- the bus lunges toward the bottom of the hill, skidding this way and that, narrowly missing lamp posts.
Heart racing and limbs nearly numb, she fumbles with the rope and it’s attached, massive steel blade. The bus’s windows are smashed right out and frame badly damaged: it’s passengers left as wide open targets for her sharp edged weapon. The beast obliterates street signs, fire hydrants, and a mangey stray cat, on it’s speedy and out of control descent toward the intersection below.
She tries to focus on the trap she’s set but all she can think about is how tired she is. How frustrated. It’s not the fear she’s been living in over the past year that’s tiring her out, but the utter annoyance of it all. She can’t even go out to the store to pick up groceries, or go for a stroll at all anymore. Not like the good old days. No, life is different now. With blood soaked attackers on the loose at every street corner and entire cities demolished, life is simply about survival now. She doesn’t even know where all of her friends and relatives have gone, or if they’re even alive. All she can do is set traps, try to take some of them out, try to make her current outpost as safe from attackers as possible.
The bus is almost at her now, spewing road grit like speeding arrows onto everything in it’s path. As the badly damaged monster comes into view she snaps out of the daydream of her past life, calms her trembling hands, and grips the rope tightly.
This place looks like a tornado’s aftermath: shit everywhere. Piles of now-ownerless shit. More debris goes flying into the air as everyday household items are turned into shrapnel: flying like bullets, but without any aim. A smashed up picture frame that’s lost it’s contents, a hairdryer, a copper frying pan, a coffee mug, the door of a microwave, and one more cat, all spewing outwards as the bus’s tires sideswipe them at lightning speed.
Toward her. It’s here.
She feels the rope tighten, cut into her palms, and then instinctively closes her eyes as the familiar spray of warmth instantly hits her face.
Blood. Their blood.
The bus screeches past her through the intersection and crashes into a rock bank just below, it’s passengers now completely decapitated from her jimmy-rigged blade-trap, yet still wriggling and moaning. Clutching at their seats and each other, they’re slowly dying. She’s done it. 36 more attackers dead. She’s that much safer now.
She looks down at her tortured hands with a sigh, and wipes her face with a filthy shirtsleeve which leaves a trail of grime across her brow and removes none of the blood. She trudges on, filthy, to plan her next trap.
What does all this mean?! It means I need to stop watching The Walking Dead before bed! I’m now dreaming about the zombie apocalypse. I’m a little late for Halloween. I haven’t been remembering many of my dreams lately, but something tells me this one’s going to stick for a while! I’ve come home from work, it’s 11:30 p.m, and so it’s time to make some bread. Of course.
Tonight’s loaf is: whole wheat bread with spicy vindaloo curry paste. Why? The question is not why, it’s why not?!
(please note in advance: I realize vindaloo is Indian, and green curry is Thai. Trust me- it works, just do it!)
1 cup warm water
1 tsp dry yeast
1 cup whole wheat flour
1 cup bread flour
3/4 tsp fine salt
2 TB vindaloo curry paste (heaped)
1 TB green curry paste (heaped)
3/4 TB fennel seeds, whole
1 large clove of garlic, minced
1 egg, for egg washing the crust
-Preheat oven to 425 F.
-In a small bowl, stir together the water, sugar, and yeast to dissolve.
-In a larger mixing bowl stir together flours and salt.
-Add the curry pastes, fennel seeds, and garlic, and mix together with a fork until the pastes are spread throughout the flour like little pea-sized balls.
-Stir your water/yeast into the flours, and mix with a wooden spoon until the dough starts to come together in a messy ball.
-Lightly oil your counter top and hands, turn dough out onto work surface, and knead lightly with your hands for 20 seconds. Set dough aside for 10 mins.
-Knead again for approximately 1-2 mins until dough starts to become elastic and there are no longer lumps. Dough should be smooth at this point.
-Note that this dough is a bit sticky, so the oiled surface and hands is important so that you don’t end up having to alter the recipe by adding more flour to make it manageable.
-Cover the dough in it’s bowl, place in a warm setting, and proof/rise the dough for about 30-45 mins (depending on the location’s temperature) until the dough has doubled in size.
-I recommend placing plastic wrap over the dough and marking it with a pen or sharpie around the dough’s edge, this way you can see it’s growth as it expands, and you’ll know whether or not it’s doubled in size.
-Remove dough from the bowl, deflate by pressing it flat. Knead lightly just a couple of times to remove the excess air bubbles and smooth the dough out again.
-Form the dough into whatever shape you like: log, braid, small rolls, whatever you like. Be creative!
-Egg wash the top of the loaf/rolls with a pastry brush, and proof again in a warm setting until it’s doubled in size once again.
-One more egg wash to ensure it’s shiny golden crust, and into the oven until golden brown.
…and… enjoy, knowing that you won’t be having to decapitate any zombie bus passengers, or at the very least: only in your dreams.